CHICKEN WITH ITS HEAD CUT OFF

AVERAGE CAPE COD RESIDENT AWAITING HURRICANE IRENE

                        I GOT UP AT 5.  I PROBABLY HAD 6 HOURS SLEEP IF I'M LUCKY.  I TURNED ON THE TELEVISION TO MAKE SURE NYC WAS STILL IN ONE PIECE AND TO SEE IF THE HURRICANE HAD HIT THERE YET.  THE WINDS IN CAPE COD 2.5 MILES FROM VINEYARD SOUND WERE SWIRLING IN NOISY GUSTS.  HURRICANE IRENE WAS STILL IN ATLANTIC CITY.  IT MADE LANDFALL THERE AT 5:30 AM.   IRENE IS NOT GAMBLING IN AC BECAUSE ALL THE  CASINOS ON THE BOARDWALK  ARE CLOSED DOWN.  IRENE IS NOW A CATEGORY 1 HURRICANE AND HEADING FOR NYC SINCE THE CASINOS AREN'T OPEN.
                       THE NEW YORK CITY SUBWAYS,TRAINS,BRIDGES AND AIRPORTS ARE CLOSED DOWN IN ADVANCE OF THE HURRICANE.  LOW LYING NEIGHBORHOODS WERE EVACUATED INCLUDING HOSPITALS.  IT'S NOW 8 AM.  NEW YORK WILL BE HIT AT 9.  THE HUDSON VALLEY AND BERKSHIRES WILL RECEIVE 10 INCES OF RAIN.  LANDFALL WILL BE NEAR BRIDEPORT IN CONNECTICUT AFTER IT HITS LONG ISLAND.  CAPE COD WILL GET 1 INCH OF RAIN AND 75MPH WIND GUSTS. 
                           SO I'VE BEEN HYPER REDECORATING MY HOUSE,BATTENING DOWN HATCHES THAT DON'T NEED MORE BATTENING AND ALL IN ALL OVER DOING IT.  MY HUSBAND IS STILL SOUND SLEEP.  HE HAD HIS HYPER FITS AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT WHEN HE TOOK BLUE RIBBON LIKE YOU WOULD USE ON WRAPPED PRESENTS TO ANCHOR DOWN HIS NEWLY PLANTED WEEPING CHERRY,JAPANESE RED MAPLE AND HEMLOCK TREES.  HE ATTACHED THE TREES TO LARGE ROCKS FROM THE ROCK GARDEN WITH BLUE RIBBON. 

MENAUHANT BEACH FALMOUTH,MA ON VINEYARD SOUND

                               SO WHO'S ONE FIRST?  I DON'T KNOW. HE'S ON SECOND.  WHAT?  WHAT'S ON THIRD.  SO WHO'S ON FIRST?  IT'S ALL STRAIGHT OUT OF DUMB AND DUMBER.  
         HANG  A BLUE RIBBON
           ON THE NEW YOUNG TREE
              IT'S BEEN 20 YEARS SINCE HURRICANE BOB
                     IRENE DO YOU STILL WANT ME?